The no show.

I mean, it was bound to happen eventually. FITBeat promised an energetic workout, to music with a soupçon of dancing thrown in. It took me a while to find the class, which was inside a young persons theatre hall. But the dude didn’t turn up! So I resolved to run to work in the morning, which sets up this running post nicely.

MOTIVATION is my game, so I am going to start with the basics. Just get off your f*cking arse right now. RIGHT NOW! Feel those things at the end of your legs – feet. They take us anywhere and everywhere.


They’re like a FREE gym hanging around, looking rather ugly I must admit (or maybe that’s just mine, THANKS  dad. No matter how much varnish I put on my toenails they still look like I nicked them off Frodo Baggins, or got given them as a booby prize. Although it’s worse for my sister, who won’t mind me adding this I hope, but I think her feet are as wide as they are long. She’s like a 3/4 and probably wouldn’t fit into the Clarks machine width wise, I call them the ‘hooves’. Sorry little sis).


So now we have established we have feet, we need trainers. Good running trainers. I would 100% recommend going to a running shop so they can see if you pronate or supinate (I pronate and I have high insteps, so have arch support, sexy).


Now clothes wise, everyone at work laughs because I wear a cap. This is so I can sort of hide underneath, as my hair is bright red, I realise it’s my own choice if it attracts rogue Spanish bulls and the like. But I think it’s nice to have anonymity when you’re running. You can push your peak down and hide from the world. Especially up hills…

jogging woman

Music!!!!! My iPhone recently broke, which is why the big gap in blog posts, and so as a result I couldn’t do ANY running. My bf was like “just run without music” ARE YOU KIDDING ME? What like run with just my THOUGHTS, HEART RATE and BREATHING? Don’t be silly. That would be like cooking without wine! Or SEX without an orgasm!

It doesn’t REALLY matter what you run to, as long as it gets you PUMPED! Like don’t get me wrong, sometimes you need medium speed to for me a nice house mix will suffice. If I want to SMASH IT then Jaguar Skills or Andy C does the job nicely.

All my PB’s are down to drum and bass. Yours might come from Taylor or Bouble – there’s no judgement here!


I read something recently about crying when you run. I thought this was just me, like it is rare – maybe thrice ever (it was really twice but I rarely get to say thrice so I took the opportunity, sorry for the exaggeration), but sometimes the world around you can be so overwhelmingly beautiful, and it mixes with the running endorphins and sort of spills out of your eyes. Mine has happened in Chicago (because it’s one of my favourite places in the whole world) and Malvern – the home town.


Back to the running – you’re kitted out, you’re music-ed up, you’re rareing to go. In Lucy’s school of running there are THREE types:

  • The long slog
  • The medium posture perfected
  • AND the horrific yet very beneficial sprints or intervals.

Long slog could be a mile the first time, but usually over 6/7 miles. You dig in, you switch off, you plan a route, you head out for hours. Good once a week even a fortnight. No more than that. Great for marathon training. Better at weekends. Perfect if you want an appetite for a roast.

The MEDIUM is your bread and butter. You need to be thinking about your posture the whole time (more on this), I would track these runs for pace, I would stick to a regular route (like on the way to work). This can again start small but my medium is about an hour. During marathon training my medium was a 10, but I just don’t think that you should do that much as it strains your heart and joints. This should be 2-3 a week (depending on your other exercise).

Then… the SPRINTS the intervals… I go dead early in the morning. I whack on the filthiest drum and bass that vibrates my soul.

And I run like the JEFFING CLAPPERS!

Pick a lamppost in the distance and PEG IT!

Then take a breather – 10-20 seconds. Then AGAIN! Repeat the whole process 1-2 miles or for about 20 mins to half hour. WOW is all I can say.

Makes all the difference to weight and your pace as it works on HIIT principles. You could actually do this 4-5 times a week and the weight would FALL OFF.

So that’s my idiots guide to running. Go feet go!